"To live is so startling it leaves little time for anything else."
Monday, October 5, 2009
Even Buddha celebrates Halloween....sort of
In one week I begin school! I am soooo excited! And, a little scared. What if I'm really not as smart as I used to be? What if all the kids make fun of me? What if I don't make any friends? What if my clothes are dorky, (oh, wait, I'm wearing a uniform....flashbacks to Catholic school)? What if I pass out when we have to start giving each other injections? How many times can one pass out in class before they expel you? OH, the stress of being a new student at a new school.....what bliss!
I feel like I should go out and buy all new school supplies. YOu know, new pencils, paper and a binder? Maybe book covers? Do they still make book covers? Do the cool kids still put book covers on their book? I used to make mine out of paper grocery bags and color all over them. They were great places to doodle when class was boring. Maybe I should just cruise through the back to school section at a couple of local supermarts and see what they've got, eh? (I have all of this crap here at home, I'm kind of a paper whore, pen snob and pencil horder, so, I really don't NEED to buy anything). Maybe I need a new binder? No, I think I have one of those here, too......(I just blew all the wind out of my sails).
I had an opportunity to spend some time with a very dear and lovely friend of mine who just completed the nursing program and received her pin this weekend....She is going to make the most awesome nurse....she inspires me in too many ways to list....she thinks she would like to work with Veterans at the local VA Hospital here......she will make the most amazing VA nurse(she used to be in the ARMY when she was but a girl)...anyway, we discussed the fact that I took the M.A. option and she really helped me be grateful for my decision. And, the best part, is she encouraged me.....she gave me some perspective and I'm glad I had a chance to have a chinwag with her.....it helped me to feel more confident in my decision.
Given how my summer progressed, with all of the ups, downs, hurdles, obstacles, starts, stops, blips, trauma, tragedy and epiphanies, I am surprised to find myself at, well, peace. I'm a little afraid to settle into this feeling, but, for some reason it feels familiar, like, maybe I have been at peace with all of the things that have happened, but, not been aware of it. I know, this sounds contrary, but, I think what I'm getting at, is that my summer as built a shroud of peace around me...what with my spiritual journey early in the summer and watching for Divine guidance with my lifepath decisions, I think somewhere along the way I grew up a little, came to know myself better and learned that things usually work out the way they are supposed to. I keep thinking that if I had started school in July, like I had originally planned, the blips I faced late this summer (it's not summer anymore, is it?) could have derailed, or at the very least, clouded up my shooling. Although I wasn't aware of this wisdom while the 'blips' were happening, it holds true, that things happen in their own time for a reason. (I know, you folks who don't believe in happenstance and divinity are shaking your heads or maybe rolling your eyes....I go there sometimes, too, but, I am finding more and more faith, therefore, I am willing to accept these notions.)
In retrospect, my summer, warts and all, was a gift. One I can look back on and not regret......not think to myself, I wasted alot of time frittering about when I 'should' have been doing (insert chore here)...? And, somehow, I was carried through by faith....
So, it is fall now.....I revelled in the Full Moon last night and even this morning at 7:10 a.m., I could STILL see the full moon as it was setting, just as the sun was rising....glorious. I am ready for the cooler temperatures, the leaves changing color and decorating my yards and for Halloween....for some fun....you know, fun, which has elluded me for a couple of weeks....look out, FUN, here I come!
P.S. we harvested our pumpkins this weekend, 20 in all...they are beautiful...I will post their mug shots later this week when I get their scenes set up....wish I could send each of you one.....
I am a woman on a mission to begin the life I have taken for granted for too long. Many changes have come in the last five years and while I have weathered them, I have not seriously taken any action to make changes for the enrichment of my life. The stories of my journey will be posted here......stay tuned for daily status of finally living a life not lived.....
To really live.....quit waiting for tomorrow....what if tomorrow never comes....what if you wake up, get dressed and head off to that job you hate and you get hit by a bus on the way.....what will you regret NOT doing? Telling someone you're sorry for hurting them? Giving your kid the 'attaboy' he or she needs to get them to the next level in their growth? Telling your friends how much they mean to you? Being there for your spouse when they've had a really bad day? Or, maybe you keep saying you're going to finally become the person you were meant to be......and you missed your chance because you didn't believe that NOW IS THE RIGHT TIME!
Been There, Done THAT..........
Spend more time with the people I love Read more....lots more Finish unpacking Take more pictures Set up my bench Use my bench Use the picture editing software on my computer Own a NIKON Tend the garden.....lovingly Have more company over for food..... Go to Blog camp in Reno Go to a Monastery and listen get a new defibrillator test out of some classes for M.A. Program finish medical assistant school
On the nightstand......
ECG Interpretation - Lippincot, Williams & Wilkins