Thursday, September 24, 2009

I miss the fun......


I feel like it's been a long time since my blog has been fun. Things at my homestead have not been fun in a few weeks. I'm flying out in the morning to be with my family as we bury my Uncle. My Dad is devastated. I've never seen him like this before. He's not a man to hide his emotions, in fact, he's not at all ashamed to cry, but, last night when I drove out to console him about his brother's death, his devastation scared me. He's a big man and a strong man, but, this, this was crushing.

I am very close to my Aunt and my surviving Grandmother lives with her. She has been doing her best to care for my Grandmother and my Uncle....her devastation, I imagine is also crushing.....I am desparate to be by her side and hold her up, just as she has held me up the MANY times I've leaned on her. My Cousins and I are close also, and I feel an intense pull to get to them all, as quickly as possible.

I feel numb about my Uncle's death. The pain I am identifying with is that of the others, my Dad, my Aunt and my Grandmother....I do not want to watch them go through this....to bury him.

Again, it seems as though the fun has been missing for awhile. Perhaps when I return from Georgia, I will emerge from this icky cloud that has been hanging around......

Please, if you visit here....do something....for me, for yourself, for those you love....TELL THEM.....

Tell them;
That you love them
That you are proud of them
That they make you smile
That they are beautiful
That they are amazing
That they are important
That they inspire you
That they are smart
That they deserve every happiness in the world
That you cannot live without them.....

Pay attention to them, listen to them, hold them.....

And, do not forget to tell God, the Universe, the Divine, and them, how grateful you are that they are in your life.......

Peace ♥

5 comments:

Bonnie Zieman, M.Ed. said...

What a difficult time for you!! It's difficult enough to deal with your own shock and loss, but to see your father so devastated must be hard indeed.

We are all stronger than we know, thank goodness. How else would we get through times like these.

Your photograph is breathtaking and so appropriate on several levels.

Fun will come . . . again.

Mari Mansourian said...

amen...sister... so important to tell the ones you love all that is in your heart.... don't i know it too well...
as far as fun... join the club.. i have no inspiration to write even... but we...must...carry...on...
hang in there...
hugs

Brian Miller said...

i will...i try every day...

travel well...know this is a difficult time. we are fast approaching the two year mark since Ts mom passed away. always a trying time. my heart goes with you.

fun times again soon.

Mike said...

I am so sorry for the things that have happened with you recently, but it will swing the other way, it always does. Hang in there!

christina said...

i hear you, i am listening, friend. i am thinking of you.
Hugs~